Wednesday, May 14, 2008

On God and Aliens, Part I

Recently I found an article stating that the head Vatican Astronomer says it's kosher to believe in both God and extraterrestrial aliens. This sparked the following conversation which I post here for your enjoyment.
Me: i'm sort of pissed
Me: cause like
Me: i've been thinking about all this stuff
Maxwell: sup?
Me: and the religious aspects and stuff
Me: of like, finding aliens and other intelligences and stuff
Maxwell: of what?
Maxwell: oh yeah
Maxwell: that would mean god doesn't exist
Maxwell: if they didn't believe
Me: and i just read this article about how this Vatican Scientist says its cool to believe in aliens and god at the same time
Me: i'll find you the link
Maxwell: ok
Maxwell: what do they say about aliens?
Maxwell: the "lost sheep" of the universe?
Maxwell: that's like the uplift novels
Me: except like
Me: all the aliens would believe in god and jesus
Maxwell: haha
Me: instead of the way sweeter Progenitors
Maxwell: well, that would make no sense
Me: dude
Me: did they have to crucify tentacle jesus too?
Maxwell: probably
Maxwell: and they probably had to send the tentacle jews to the desert for 40 years
Me: "oh lord, why hast thou forsaken me" translates to "blark bloop flurp kraaach mnaar!"
Maxwell: hahaha
Me: hahaha
Maxwell: who knows if they're even monotheistic?
Maxwell: they're probably polytheistic, if anything
Maxwell: just because it makes more sense
Me: but what about asexual alien races? "and lo, did god create Xar, and Xar slowly multiplied into many other Xars, and spread across the earth"
Maxwell: haha
Me: its more natural, thats for sure
Me: but he's saying that if there are aliens
Me: they would have been created by God
Maxwell: yeah, god made xar out of xar's rib
Me: and so believe in the same God
Maxwell: i mean, how many sons of god can exist?
Maxwell: wouldn't that be adultery?
Me: And from the rib of Xar did god create an identical xar, and said "thou shalt be xar and xar, and well, um, make more xars. shit. don't cheat on each other? fuck, there aren't any genders... how are you going to have sodomy and premarital sex and shit?"
Me: technically God coveted his neighbours wife cause he totally jacked up Mary
Me: virgin birth my ass
Me: he wouldn't pass up that fine ghetto booty
Maxwell: that xar booty
Me: dude
Me: all xar births are virgin births
Maxwell: haha
Maxwell: i guess you're right
Me: i guess the Xar are without sin
Me: they must be perfect!
Maxwell: no original sin
Me: i wish i was xar
Me: betentacled perfection
Maxwell: we all can be
Maxwell: when we follow xar jesus
Me: praise xar jesus
Maxwell: praise him

And so it is for my first post. See you next time!